Easter 2014 next to my almost blooming lilacs!
Where does the time go? I kind of feel like I've missed a few years during this crazy ride. Some seasons are well etched and vivid in my mind, some are like a far away memory and some I just don't remember living through! But it also helps me to really GET what an experienced grandma once told me, that there are different seasons of life and you can do it all but you have to do it in the right season (she was enjoying a fulfilling career after years of being a stay at home mom). I am in this weird place in-between seasons, I am trying not to hurry the end of the one or the beginning of the other. I am not the mom of babes anymore (and after so long in that mode it is very strange). I did not go to the "Big Cloth Diaper Change" nor will I go to the "Big Latch On" this year. Instead I run to piano, or scouts, or homeschool co-op and dig my heels about how much technology comes in...
It's also an awakening in a sense. I have started to remember who I am and desire to be me again. Can you believe I have interests and talents in more than pinning a explosion proof cloth diaper (although I proudly wear that accomplishment)! I'm glad to be a mama but I am also glad to find out that after years of surviving and being a different form of myself that I am still me! I am different and changed from the experiences of the last 14 or so years but it is comforting to find myself under all these layers.
My kids still need me (some days more than possible) but it's not the same constant need. They can scrounge up things to eat if I'm absorbed in a sewing or knitting project, they are even great at helping me unearth the kitchen after an amazing cooking storm (or a few rough days worth of dishes)!
I know in a few years I will look at this picture as I now look at others and think how young they all were and how little I knew, but right now I see this picture as a time of change. And I'm happy with the change, there may be some growing pains but I think this is all good.
And Happy May Day! Who will you give flowers to today?